I just saw the other day where someone said one of their hobbies was "journaling". Ok right, journaling is the new "deary diary" of my day. When I was growing up they had little locks with itty bitty little keys on them and you thought you were going to write something OH. SO. SERIOUS. Umm yea at 11, go figure.
My mom gave me one for Christmas one year, it was a Hello Kitty Sanrio. I wrote it in a few weeks, then showed some friends and even my mom.
I don't even know why people keep journals or diaries. What's the point *shrugs* It's oh so one sided. Who really tells the truth? And if you do, do you go back and read it? Baring your soul to even yourself is rough. Fast forward, twenty-something years and I have started a diary every year as my New Year's Vow since that first fateful Hello Kitty diary. Sigh...but I never get past like March because....well....I'm lying to myself.
And I hate a liar. I'd rather not deal with a liar.
Seriously. I'm always writing who I hope I am, who I want to be when I "grow up" or how I hope people perceive me, but not me. The real me? *Looks around* What if someone finds it?
And 50 years they will find I was no Anne Frank. Those guys I screwed in my parents house (umm yeah that really was my boyfriend's Trojan)
Cause I'm a hoe you know I'm a hoe
How do you know because I told ya so
Or that I once tried to eat toilet paper for a week to lose 15lbs before a ball (hey a model gave me that tip). Hell, it worked too. Insert PSA here. Don't try this at home.
Umm yeah, no thanks I pass.
I think if more people wrote their really bad secrets down there would be no need for Jerry Springer, Oprah (the trash-show Oprah of my day) and all of those other daytime shows. The things if someone else told you, you'd have your girl in a straight jacket looped out on little yellow pills.
You know like: If you let your man's BFF raw dog you last week, just write it down and then read it and look at how stupid you look.
See. Now how did that feel?
You know why Weight Watchers and the people that keep food journals actually lose weight? Well...because after you went and worked out, got home and ate four ho-ho's, you realize that you're probably NOT gonna look that great in your Christmas pictures and you"ll start talking about that damn thyroid problem again your know your fat ass doesn't have. Just read what you ate today.
I don't care what folks saying, journaling or keeping a diary, is just too real for ya girl. I like to keep my shit straight fantasy for myself. I haven't reached those personal ephiphanies yet. Oh wait, I do know that sex in my parents house was wrong and that TP tricked worked but beyond that, sorry I'm working my stuff out just like you.
